Rhonda Branneky de Gier

A Mother's Blog

October 1, 2011
iloverondos
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Writings from America

Modems, modus apparandi and freedom in America

Somehow me thinks that everything in America, including internet connections would be better than in Europe. That thinking be disproved on every network I have yet tried to link
up with on my computer since arriving in America on July 31, 2011.

Who’s network am I intended to link up with? Whose network am I on? I have family here, that is a blood link. Yet, I have not been able to link up my laptop to any of their computers. Everyone has wireless but no one knows their own access code. Everyone is linked up by a 3rd party. Even on the Amtrak train there was no Wi-Fi, and every station I passed through had wireless systems which I tried to link up with, to no avail! Every unsecured system asked a password or identification which would be passed on to the owner of the network, for approval, which never happened while I had connection.

It all makes me think of my upbringing and a conversation we had this morning with a mother peer of my sister: Does the conservative’s way of setting boundaries, establishing rule and authority reach what it sets out to do? Do children of conservative Christians become Christians themselves? Are the “bad apples” really so bad or only struggling to find their own voices, be their own bosses by trial and error? Are the parents who continually come in, pick up the pieces and chastise the children teaching them to be independent? Were these parents also raised by picking up the pieces of their children’s mistakes, thereby creating freedom and liberty, with love, Christian principles and justice in these people? Is it a random happening, only occurring with some certain chosen people, does it follow bloodlines or are there certain karmic rules which determine upon whom favour falls?

These are all questions I ask when coming back to my roots. I can write you a whole list of blessings and things which have happened upon which favour has befallen me since I came and I will end this blog log by doing that. I do not wish to choose to be victim of the misfortune of my son’s 2x leukaemia diagnosis and treatment (lasting a total of 4 years out of his 19) or my divorce (now 4 years behind me). I choose to be a Queen, a Conqueror, a Holy Mother, a person who is following Christ’s example, a missionary, a peace-maker, a likeness of Christ and the holiest people alive.

Blessings which have been bestowed upon me since arriving and journeying to the United States:
1. the KLM help desk from London, the woman who’s name is like St. Charles, kept my reservation for 2 days and her work partner, who’s name is like St. Mark, booked my ticket to come in high season for the best possible price on the direct flight to Dallas from Amsterdam.
2. My cousin David Adam and I were blessed with the presence of the developer of the real estate around the restaurant where we ate, St. Anne’s, on the day before my departure. David Adam Caran mean’s “beloved first son of the Tsar” or perhaps, meaning “first man or general to the Tsar”. All the men in my mother’s side of the family are named after each other 5 generations long: “Adam Draga (Draga meaning beloved) Caran (Caran meaning Tsar).
3. The train to St. Louis had an overnight ride in the coach section and I would have had nothing to cover me while I slept. The woman behind my seat at the station was making a throw, a sort of blanket, while we waited for the train, which was late. When I met her in the lounge car in the train, with picturesque windows, we talked and it turned out she had had discipleship training with Youth With A Mission in Hawaii. I told her, depending on the outcome of my hearing in the higher court in the Netherlands, that I might consider doing training with YWAM in order to minister to Muslim people in Europe, the Middle East or elsewhere as part of God’s plans for my future career.

August 4, 2011
iloverondos
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Parental Alienation Awareness Day

Light a candle for the victims of Parental Alienation/Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) and in support of Parental Alienation Awareness Day (PAAD). Light a candle to symbolize the light at the end of the tunnel, where alienated children and “target” parents may find their way back through the darkness to a healthy and loving relationship that endures. On April 25th, light a candle, say a prayer or have a moment of silence for the child victims of Parental Alienation. If your own children are victims, light a candle for each of them. Let’s work together to fight our way back through the darkness! Our children deserve the love of both of their parents! Invite all your friends and family to this event. Let’s help protect our children from Parental Alienation by promoting awareness and creating an open dialog, locally, nationally and internationally.

July 27, 2011
iloverondos
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Carola is Charles in Dutch

I just want to witness to you how God works in my life- I called back the KLM reservations desk- yesterday I got the same lady, Carola, and I had told her the reason for my flight and that it was hard to leave, my son was a 2x leukemia survivor. I apologized to her for mentioning this but she said she thought it was worth mentioning, I thanked her for her compassion. I thought my reservation was going to crash as it had been held for 24 hours but she said she would continue to try to put my payment through until 7 am when her shift ended and that if the money was not on by then that she would extend the reservation until it was!  Now that is an answer to prayer, God works through people!  And I had just found my 2 charms of St. Charles from the Abbey in Dublin close to where I had lived… you get it?  Charles?  Carola?  (Carolus is latin for Charles).  Lots of love, just open your eyes to al the ways God is trying to reveal His love in your life!

July 26, 2011
iloverondos
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St. Charles is working in heaven for me and my family!

I have to tell you how God works in my life
it is absolutely certain
that He hears ALL my prayers!
did you know last night I went to the Korean to get something hot
after going to the airpot
and in my bag I found 2 coins with St. charles’s face
with reliquie I got in Ireland?
I held them and kissed them
and remembered fondly how I prayed for Sebastian at the place where Father Charles celebrated mass, near my home
in Ireland
and I thanked him for hearing my prayers and bringing them as well as myself directly to God
I sat at the window where St. Charles was praying in front of St. Sebastian
my son’s name saint
and celebrated mass
and today he sends Carola again to be my agent at the reservations desk! Amazing!

July 26, 2011
iloverondos
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This is absolutely wonderful, how God works in my life!
He never NEVER fails me!
I know you will have a wonderful time in US
I want to ask you to continue to pastor me
I know I will have many opporunities and make the money back.
I want to witness and teach and tell all I have been doign over here.
You need to write in your blog. It will help you and your friends and otehr people that is reading it.
Can you do that?
I pray that God would find me ANY kind of job, as long as I can pay the ticket back!
And pray about Anthonius, the young Chinese man who comes on Thursday to see about subletting my house. Antonius helps children find their way back to their mothers. And helps children in hopeless situations

July 22, 2011
iloverondos
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Contact with my Sons

Finally, the silence has broken! Benjamin answered Sebastian’s Skype yesterday when I left a message! We proceeded to have a chat for 1 1/2 hours, without sound or picture. At one point I could call him and he could hear my voice, he could only type in Dutch-English. It was tremendous to have the contact back with my child!

2 very hurtful things he said when I asked him when he wanted to see me back again was:   “slowly but surely, maybe from September but Jeugdzorg definitely has a role” and when I mentioned 6 months was a long time he said “see it as a vacation”.   Additionally he asked me to bring him an Iphone back from America, what a cheeky boy!  I don’t think the first statement came from his own mouth.  How could he formulate that?

July 21, 2011
iloverondos
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<My vision was as follows:
I was in the hotel room in Palestine, overlooking the Mount of Olives, the graves facing East and the Dome over the Rock. The 2 arabs, the owner's son Mohammad and his side-kick sat up with a group of us on New Year's eve until 4 am. I had supplied the apple wine from Haifa and several guests. In the group were a Japanese schoolteacher who had been to Gaza and taken photos were there, Mar Laine and her husband, Angella, who came on Benjamin's ticket, Mohammad the owner's youngest son and his side kick Mohammad, and myself, the hostess. I slept after that then at 7 am the 2nd one, the side-kick phoned me and told me my breakfast was ready. I had the breakfast in my room then went back asleep until 9 am and that is when I had this vision, from which I woke up crying and liberated:

I had 1 hour to leave holland- Nico had threatened and to send the police after me and put me in jail. I hated the idea but believed him and accepted his warning and the more I started to leave the harder it was to get back in, he was in a small box in the corner of the big square picture and I had to find keys to flmsy locks to try to get back in, it was like jumping over a wall, each time I went further I regretted it as I looked back and my children were imprisoned in this box with him- I knew if I left for good I would still get back into the box by justice or law system but each step was excruciatingly small, like flimsly locks and small keys.

Looking back caused me so much grief- I knew I was leaving my children-an almost unbearable grief but knowing if I did not go I would be imprisoned back in that prison until the system set me free, then I would be so conditioned (like my son Benjamin is now) I would not be able to go- so I did move forward, into the white space and out of the dark, void prison where the children and father stay. If I stayed in that place, I was smitten by grief AND imprisoned in the place where father has caught the children-
So I moved forward onto a neutral space, safe, away from the police trying to catch me, the Dutch justice system. That white balcony was the same as standing on top of the Haifa Bahaí gardens from the Carmel mountain top— It was amazing what I saw all out in front of me, it just invited me to step inside- step forward and then I was out in there, out inside the future in 7/8 of that big, white space in the box, only 1/8 was occupied by father imprisoning his children. It was beautiful and I knew I only had to have the courage to step forward…

May 16, 2011
iloverondos
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3-min. Monday Blog

Monday is always a day of getting started back up, into the routine, the swing of things.  The swing now is to contest this Benji prohibition thing and not wait for the to ” change”  their minds.    Thursday is the appointment to secure a new lawyer, I’m copying reports for talks with the teacher, the psychiatrist and anyone else who will listen.  Lindsay says to start  following courses in child-raising to show that I am active event though my child is not with me.  That seems to be a very good idea.  I hardly have time for useless etiquette’s about ” Satisfaction in the Neighborhood”  and so on.  I think my sons are separated from me because they are afraid of their father.  They believe the image he has created of me and that is not exactly one of Maria, Mother of God.  I must put a lot of things straight which are wrong on the assessments and reports about my son, all information which the father has given.  Talk about trying to influence matters!  The only person that really matters to hear my truth is the judge for the higher court, the same as in 2006.  It is a repeat cycle of the same things, in these past 6 years.  It cannot be the right thing for a child to be separated from his mother, as was the case in my ex-husband and his siblings, though his mother really did have a terrible illness, MS, which caused her to want to kill herself.  Poor woman, indeed!  Thank God, I am not in that position!